On Being Social Network Savvy

I did not invent the internet, or chat, or MySpace, etc. I did become a fan. I guess that stands for something. Without fans who diligently used the services, they would have failed and disappeared into that great place where things go that are obsolete.

I was one of the first (at least in Finland) to use the internet. When the sham of a marriage began to fall apart, I discovered chat. Chat used to be fun. I could have several chat windows open and work at the same time. This was because the systems in those days were so slow that no one realized they were not the only person with whom I was chatting. It was a great place to escape, better than a bar, one could end up with a hangover after escaping to a bar. In Cyberland, you could be whoever you wanted to be, even yourself.

I got so into it that the empathy and intuitiveness I exhibited in “the real world” found a place in Cyberland. On one occasion, I was chatting with a guy in Michigan who lived in a small town. He said he that did not have many friends so that is why he either worked or was in the chat room. He had an endearing name, “Careforyou”. I contacted him, as he seemed to only observe and not participate. It turned out that (at lease in Cyberland) he was a dear, sensitive guy.

Upon hearing his story, my heart wanted to reach out to him and hug him. Instead, all I could do was tell him that he at least for now, had one friend he could count on, me. I waited for a response but he wrote, “I feel strange, I’ve got to go” and disconnected. For weeks, he would not respond to my pings. When finally, he answered, I asked about the strange behavior. He told me it was because he felt something. I asked if it was physical or mental. He wrote, both. He thought he felt someone touch him. He was the first of many people I could have a cyber-physical effect on.

As more people discovered chat, the environment changed. It went from being a great hangout place to the equivalent of a neighborhood when “the wrong types of people move in”. Cyber-cat-fights, shamelessly seeking virtual sex, airing dirty laundry, verbally abusing people… this is to what I am referring. I created a web site and put chat on it but it did not do well. I did not have enough experience creating one or time.

I had Hotmail and Yahoo chat. I tried other chat sites, only to find that after being there for a while, the same type of people moved in. When I lived in Manhattan, it was like that. A “regular’s lifespan” at a nightspot was short lived. As soon as the “bridge and tunnel people” took over, it was downhill after that. In Manhattan I learn the art of “bar hopping”. In Cyberland, I learn the art of “chat hopping”.

Skype came before or after MySpace. I do not remember the exact order. I tried MySpace but did not find it interesting. I liked Skype because, with a microphone it was almost like "being there". Time difference was the problem with Skype. When we in Finland were up, friends in Australia were going to bed and Americans were not up yet. We Europeans were usually at work the same time so we did not chat much with each other, we met either in person or over the phone.

I had email boxes with Hotmail, Excite, Yahoo, Scandinavica, and others (15 total) I have long forgotten. Traveling as I did, I needed the 15 mailboxes to handle the volume of mail I was getting. They were especially handy as file storage. The USB drive had not been invented yet. This was also pre-gigabyte days. I could save my work as a draft letter attachment and have it wherever I went.

In the real world, I had to go all the way to a place called Finland to learn to spend an hour chatting with someone. Prior to that, most of my life, I was a 20\4 girl; busy 20 hours (work 10-15 hours), sleep four. Nothing was going on in Finland other than watching the snow fall or drunken Finns (just kidding). For this reason, I learn to sit around for hours (oftentimes) trying to chat with people in person. Finnish is not a language one picks up quickly. You must have a full vocabulary to attempt speaking it. It you go to school, they will teach you book Finnish, which no one speaks.

Back to the subject. While Finland, I joined Facebook . I had an account but not the time to get involved at first. “LinkedIn” came next, to connect to other professionals but I did not know anyone at the time on the network. So the account sat dormant for quite a while.

In 2005 I took a hiatus from the Internet's social network while traveling. I would occasionally check my email boxes to keep them from closing but I had little time to do otherwise. Only recently, in 2007, did I pick it back up again.

I discovered Twitter. Thinking it to be a better vehicle (because all the “experts” said so), I tried Twitter. Forgive me “Twitterites” but Twitter bores me! Who has the time to mention every detail of their lives? Oddly enough, Serena Williams appears to have time. I wonder how she wins so many matches with the amount of Twits she sends.

I returned to Facebook because it offers me the variety I crave. Facebook could be better but of the five most popular social networks, it suits my needs best. I am in the process of trying to learn how to better customize the pages. Then, I will be happy.

When I started using the internet, I made up a (what I thought was) clever pseudo-name. I took the planet under which my sun sign was ruler as a first name and the Babylonian equivalent as a last name. All was well; my identity was protected, just in case this new technology proved to be unstable. All of my emails and the website I created used my pseudo-name.

One day while checking my counter to see from where my visitors originated, I discovered that I was a favorite with the US Government. They made so many visits to my site that I got high rankings. It took me some time to realize that they probably did not get my cleverness and evidently thought I might be a terrorist (this is pre-9/11). The clever name also got me high ratings on Google. No one else had been as clever as me to use the name. One of my pages had such a clever title, it continued to rate #1 on Google years later.

So there you have my story. Before I go, before I sign off, I must tell you my other “clever” name… UniqueCyberBabe. That too has gotten me in trouble. At one time, a Cyberbabe was someone who was a female Nerd. Later it was someone who practiced Cyber Sex. When I took the name, it was not my intention to imply that I participated in or wanted to have Cyber Sex. It was meant to imply that I am super cool in Cyberland.

Ciao Bello, Bella…